My Brand of Crazy

Self-professing workaholic here. No apologies, no regret, just a fact. For much of my adult life I knew I didn’t want children and for the longest time I wasn’t sure I wanted to get married (it really snuck up out of nowhere). Those two elements contributed to my already dedicated nature and propelled me into years of singularly-focused late nights hammering away at whatever my nonprofit organization needed. I was genuinely happy and content in my simple life.

Running a marathon popped into my head at the beginning of 2015. Crazy? 100%. But I did it, I loved it, and the first obsession began. This newfound love of my life gave me an outlet. I prayed while I ran, I released stress as I attacked miles and miles of San Diego hills and I learned that I was capable of so much more than I thought.

During a sort of spiritual awakening in 2018, I felt like another spark was ignited. My voice. I felt compelled to step out of my introverted shell and speak up for what moves me deeply. I am especially drawn to challenging Christian women to undo some of the stereotypes that minimize who we are and what we have to contribute to the world and especially the Church.

GRIT became my mantra and the Pieces of Grit podcast was birthed in late 2018. I adore podcasting - finding and connecting with women from all different backgrounds who are digging their heels in to accomplish things in their heart. It’s so fun to see how we are connected with a desire to use all the gifts and strengths we have been given, yet it looks different for each person. The individual creativity is constantly inspiring. 

I also started writing a book, which is still only halfway finished. One of these days…

As mentioned, I live a simple life. I LIKE a simple life. I like having a job, knowing what’s expected, who I work with and what tomorrow will hold.

God turned my life upside down in 2019 like a janky snow globe . I thought I was living on the edge with an evolving job position, and not one, but two intense hobbies. I’m plain wild, amiright???

But God laughed and began showing me I had to leave this comfortable place. I resigned from the job I had adored for 10+ years. I also didn’t look for another job. (panic!) All of that is still evolving and I hope to share more of that if I can remember to blog more often.

As soon as I had the final conversation with my boss and solidified that I was leaving my church, something incredible in me opened up. Simultaneously the hardest thing I’ve done in walking away from that church, I felt freedom and creativity flood every ounce of my body.

Since November 2019 I feel like I have a different weekly obsession. I’ve learned not to include Brooks in all my antics because others don’t understand my brand of crazy. We all have our own brand and people around us don’t NEED to get it, they just need to respect our individuality and try not to judge too harshly.

I’m sure you’re dying to know what I’ve become obsessed with, so here are a few that I can remember:

• I did a little bit of church consulting and thought I might want to pursue that. Still has potential.
• I tried doing PR for a serial entrepreneur with a new startup. Nah, not for me.
• I started building a website to help churches and nonprofits find freelancers who specifically want to serve a good cause. It’s pretty much built, but now I don’t have a lot of time to market it. Still on the back burner.
• I started learning how to code. I want to at least be able to understand the back end of my website.
• I took a course on SEO.
• I got certified in Google Analytics. I’m a beginner.
• I started a little garden, which always felt overwhelming when I had a full-time job. It’s growing, but I don’t love it.
• I wrote a workbook on navigating personal chaos and discovering more of who you are. It’s available on Amazon and my website, but I don’t push it because IDK, maybe it’s not that great. I just wanted to do it.
• I made myself learn to use TikTok.
• I started learning how to shuffle dance. Look it up. On TikTok. 
• SOOOOO many health things. I’m really going to start tracking these because it’s hysterical all the things I try. In spite of my desire to live a short life, I’m obsessed with health, nutrition and exercise.
• I tried seed cycling for hormones.
• I bought CBD suppositories for cramp relief. BTW - the BEST thing ever to help with my periods.
• I also tried making my own, which was not as successful as I hoped. 
• I started drinking a mixture of baby formula, apple skins, and red phenol powder to feed bacteria in my stomach. If you’ve had years of digestive issues, you, too, may understand my willingness to try anything.
• I toyed with the idea of buying roller skates, but haven’t done that one yet.

The mind reels that there could be more, but there definitely other things I could add. The plan is to share more of these in real time. I laugh at myself every time I tell someone about a new idea and I can only imagine what is going through the minds of the dear friends who listen to my ever-changing obsessions.

More important than any of these individual items, I’m intrigued with what changed in my head and heart. Perhaps stepping away from a full-time, all-encompassing traditional job finally freed up the creative section of my brain to explore. Maybe turning 40 jacked up my wiring and middle age is actually making me crazy. Or perhaps I’m in a REALLY healthy place for the first time in my adult life and as an Enneagram Type 1, I’ve gone to the healthy space of a Type 7 and want to do all the things.

I also believe I'm much less afraid of failure and if I learn nothing else in my life, that is enough.

Whatever it is, I am loving the fresh perspective on life and seeing what God is doing in me during a whole new season.

Stay tuned for more weekly obsessions!